Acrostic Poems About Going Grey in My Thirties

White hairs multiplying

On temples, and even on high of my head.

What ought to I do about them?

Once more, simply looking within the mirror—

Gee, that’s greater than final time.

Excuse me, I’m solely thirty-eight.

Greg, my stylist, hasn’t mentioned something.

Actually surprise if I ought to provoke dialog

About dyeing my hair, or if we are able to simply maintain going like regular.

Yesterday, I noticed one other lengthy, white one in a spot I didn’t anticipate (heart of chest).

Perhaps it’s not so unhealthy—

Really, is it?

No hurt in trying once more to verify.

Every part is O.Ok., I believe!

Wholesome strands

Are merely shedding pigment, proper?

In sure lighting, they give the impression of being brown as ever,

Reminding me of my twenties.


Additionally, when it’s moist,

Going to notice that my hair is

Particularly darkish and vibrant.

Cool skunk stripe, like Stacy London’s, when dry?

Oh, effectively, no—that’s not occurring with my hair.

Actually extra like spiderwebs

On high of the brown, spreading throughout my scalp.

Rocking chair is correct right here—ought to I settle in?

Co-worker who hasn’t seen me in particular person,

Off Zoom, in fifteen months,

Calmly says, as I, a ghost, emerge from my constructing,

“Oh, you will have grey hair.” What can I say? Perhaps:

“Proper! Like a pumpkin in November, I’m in decline.”

Date from Hinge—

Sure, he seen it, too—

Even that man! (He mentioned so, whereas we listened to a jazz band within the park.)

Amused or confused he was, by the

Grandmother on his picnic blanket? Ought to I modify my profile image?

Finally males might want to know that my physique is decaying.

Or I might go completely on water-centric dates—

A number of enjoyable available collectively whereas scuba diving.

Doing that might enable me to showcase my hair in its wettest, darkest type.

Greg, I say, visiting the salon. How are you?

Common lower for me, please, your traditional magic.

Ah, certainly, O.Ok. You’ve knowledgeable me that

You, too, see the grays now.

Do you know you could get a tinted gloss?

Yeah, it lasts six weeks and it’s gentler than dye, Greg says.

Each six weeks, for the remainder of my life, I can spend 100 and fifty {dollars}.

What would my favourite ladies’s research professor say?

Her opinion could be that

It’s O.Ok. to dye and O.Ok. to go away as is.

Time passes, and also you generally is a good feminist both method—as much as you.

Eh, I’m at an deadlock!

Hey, I can observe the grombre account on Instagram—

Many articles about it on Glamour’s Website,

Many photographs of youngish, glad, graying ladies.

Might I be identical to them!

Extra Humor

  • Compliments I acquired in my thirties, translated.
  • A wonderfully cheap request.
  • Focused adverts based mostly on my innermost ideas.
  • An ideal, preëmptive obituary for my ex-boyfriend.
  • Sexual fantasies of on a regular basis New Yorkers.
  • Causes I used to be crying on the subway.
  • No, I’m from New York.
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